Category Archives: personal essay

A Peony For My Mother

There are things that you’ll remember in the oddest of times; remarkably some extremely trivial, after someone close to you has gone on.
Time pulls your heartstrings out of it and untangles the ribbons that once held your heart so interwoven with another.

Finally, you can breathe again and be filled up with just the simple memories. You now can look at a photo and see that your loved one was smiling and enjoying some momentary happiness. This doesn’t lessen the longing or the missing, just maybe the tears.

I choose to retell a time in the summer of 1980, it’s hot and early June, I came to visit my mom. I moved out in 1979 because I thought that this was some kind of requirement as I wasn’t in college. In this era, if you weren’t backward thinking, you weren’t thinking. It was fun visiting my mom back then, we always had a very rich engaging conversation and I loved our visits.

Looking out onto the “screen porch”, which is what we called our four season room that my father single-handedly built, and don’t you forget it, the table was set with a jug of sun tea, glasses, and a small cake. I smiled as I looked down on it seeing the old chewed on Tupperware glasses, grandma Nona “Banna” old plates, the old flocked tablecloth that had been washed so many times the print was coming off in some places! Last but not least, was the ashtray overflowing with spent butts and perhaps a nighttime deck soiree.

There it is, I think now, a true snapshot of times ago.

Anyway, I called out for my mom, she responded that she was outback. I found her on her knees weeding her flower beds. She and my father were extremely prideful on how manicured their home was. They had a glorious garden reaping with a bountiful harvest as well as these prizewinning favorite flowers; pink peonies, and yellow roses.
I joined my mother sitting in the grass and began plucking weeds by hand, following her lead. We talked about the nice weather and then on to the flowers. She began to tell me how the bees were attracted to the beautiful show the flowers were putting on. She went on to say that her observation of the bees was that even they would compete to land on the flower. We began to get sunburned as we chatted about the flowers, we decided to go get our tea.

Mom began tea with a freshly lit cigarette and of course, I smoked then too. We went on at least another hour with jokes and conversation.

On my way home in the car, I realized that my mother was talking about me the entire time. So I broke up with my boyfriend and put on a bra! I planted a pink peony bush in my yard to honor her because nothing has ever been the same since.

A true snapshot of times ago for me means a peony for my mother and memories that just maybe provoke more smiles than tears.

Happy Mother’s Day.2018-05-14 13.00.16

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Road Trippin…..

Road Trippin

 

There’s the rumble of the tires on the asphalt road, the wind blowing across the car with deafening sound and sweaty hair stuck to faces, as kids in the back seat ask, “When are we going to get there?”

There’s a stop for gas and a Polaroid camera, the station with a general store attached to it has salt water taffy and I am happy; all the flavors are my favorites! The man came out and began to fill my dad’s car up with gas and he washed the bugs off the windshield too! He and my dad chatted as the man pointed here and there as they were both looking at the atlas.

My mom sprayed her hair with hairspray and went back to reading her romance paperback. I don’t know why she keeps doing that we’re all choking back here! Also my mother thinks we can’t read too, it’s a book about kissing I am sure of it!

My brothers argue and wrestle, but me, I just peered out into the sky above me. I’m watching the clouds; they somehow look different out here. I suppose being out in the middle of nowhere means there just might be a little more sky!

I see there is way more room to play, but it doesn’t look like there are any kids around, just miles of corn and behind that  miles more of corn!  By the time my dad has gotten back into the car, I have already spotted an entire zoo worth of animals in those clouds, and I can even swear I see my grandmother’s face there too!

Time to go back onto the humming road now and count the thwamps and rumbles on the different pavements and undoubtedly I will fall fast asleep and miss the Native Americans on the plains that I think I might see.  I will also miss the license plate game my mom will play or 50 guesses question game, but who cares I’ll have my dreams of being a prairie girl like in my story books.

I’ll dream of what could be in the next town and the town after that!  And from this day on I will always have a sense of wonder, of what that next town will bring, more flavors of taffy pulled; I hope, or maybe just maybe, how many more miles of unfound zoo animals or grandmothers faces will be in the sky above me.

Very Drew Peterson Update

As many of you have followed my site for a long time, you may have seen my true disdain for Mr. Drew Peterson. I have a small update I’d like to report.

It goes as follows:

The Third District Appellate Court has upheld the guilty verdict and 38 year prison sentence placed on Drew Peterson. He was found guilty of drowning his estranged wife, 40 year old Kathleen Savio in March of 2004.

Also Peterson still faces charges of solicitation of murder for hire and solicitation of murder.

The complaint is that, Peterson, behind bars, secured an unnamed person to find another person to kill Will County State’s Attorney James Glascow.

To the circus clown that thought he was the teflon don~ how are you liking the view?

Just my thoughts, Just my opinions and always in a ConversationalTone.

A Little Bit of Something

So much to bitch about and there’s so little time!

The holiday’s are coming, so I’m sure my ire will be elevated, and I’ll be willing to bet that yours will be too!  After all, it’s time to hit the stores to buy food,(and booze) and presents and more food and way more (booze) (notice how I’m trying to whisper in parenthesis?) Anyway, a certain amount of the bah hum bugs happens because there are people out and about that barely ever come out of their houses to do much of anything, let alone to shop for kids presents or food for a family gathering. That means the couch potato has left its nest, and that could be an ugly thing.

So once you step over the door threshold and step into a midnight sale or a holiday deep discount two for one thingy, remember shopping basket road rage is a definite thing! And if you can get a jolly at all~  remember there’s actually  people out with their morning jammies and slippers on! This is great for a laugh or ten, or perhaps an istagram post or two. Have fun shopping and hanging out, but mostly remember the looks on their faces knowing you tirelessly shopped, picked out and tailored a gift for them!!

Haha to be continued….

Just my thoughts, just my opinions, and always in a Conversationaltone.